April marks the celebration of Autism Acceptance Month. During this special month, Sheletta Brundidge has penned a heartfelt children’s book that beautifully captures the journey of her oldest son, Andrew Brundidge, as he lovingly cares for his younger siblings with autism. This remarkable book serves as a valuable guide for parents navigating the challenges and joys of raising children with special needs.
In her latest book, Sheletta Brundidge pays tribute to her oldest son, Andrew, who has always longed to be heard. Despite his desire for attention and recognition, Andrew often felt overshadowed by his siblings’ needs and his mother’s previous books about her other children with autism. But with this new book, Andrew finally gets his chance to share his own story and find his voice.
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Andrew, with his unique perspective, shares a valuable piece of advice for parents who may unintentionally overlook one child. He suggests that spending quality time with your children whenever possible is crucial. This serves as a powerful reminder to cherish each moment and never neglect the importance of being there for all your kids.
In an exclusive interview with ABC News Live, Sheletta and Andrew Brundidge opened up about their book on the challenges and rewards of caring for Andrew’s younger siblings with autism, as well as their experiences as parents of children with special needs.
During Autism Awareness Month in April, we are featuring a remarkable individual, Sheletta Brundidge, who has three children diagnosed with autism. Today, Sheletta is joined by her son, Andrew. We first met Sheletta four years ago when her daughter, Cameron, who has autism, published her first children’s book. Interestingly, Andrew, Sheletta’s eldest, does not have autism. Nevertheless, it is significant to understand why Andrew felt compelled to write his own book.
Sheletta had initially believed that her son, Andrew, didn’t need a book. Being a mother to three children with autism, Sheletta had been writing books to raise awareness and acceptance for children on the spectrum. After completing her third book about her third child with autism, she felt she had done enough. However, Andrew expressed his desire for a book of his own. Sheletta reminded him that he didn’t have autism, to which Andrew responded, “Mom, you spend so much time focused on the kids who could not talk that you forgot about the one who could.” It was at that moment that Sheletta realized Andrew needed a voice, and a book would provide just that.
ABC NEWS LIVE: Andrew, how significant is it for you to finally have your own book?
ANDREW: This experience has held immense significance in my life. As the eldest child among my three siblings who have autism, there are moments where I feel overlooked. Whether I achieve good grades, my mother may not take much notice or show much interest, saying, “Okay, that’s cool.” Similarly, if my grades are not up to par, she responds with, “Okay, that’s nice,” you know? However, with the creation of this book, I intend to highlight the experiences of the non-autistic sibling, often referred to as the ‘normal developing child.’ I want to address their feelings of being forgotten or unseen. Through this book, I aim to convey the message that they are not forgotten, their voices are heard, and their presence is acknowledged.
ABC NEWS LIVE: Have you ever felt like your three siblings received more attention and you were left out?
“Of course, ma’am,” Andrew replied politely.
ABC NEWS LIVE: If parents find themselves neglecting a child who is capable of being independent and self-sufficient, I would offer them some advice. It is important to remember that even though the child may appear capable, they still require attention, love, and support from their parents. It is crucial to remind these parents that their child needs their time, affection, and focus as well. It is not enough to assume that they can handle everything on their own.
Andrew emphasizes the importance of spending quality time with your children while they are still young. He believes that as a parent, it is crucial to prioritize your children and show them love and affection. By investing time and attention in your kids, you can create lasting memories and strengthen your bond with them. Andrew urges parents not to neglect their children and to make them a priority in their lives.
ABC NEWS LIVE: Can you share the moment when your mom asked you to shovel the snow? I’ve heard that you’re quite the dancer as well.
“Absolutely, ma’am,” Andrew replied respectfully.
ABC NEWS LIVE: What occurs when you find yourself shoveling the snow on this occasion?
Andrew found himself shoveling snow in Minnesota, a task he always performed diligently whenever it snowed. Little did he know that his mom had secretly recorded him dancing and shoveling the driveway with a camera. It wasn’t until the following day or the day after that someone approached him, saying, “Hey, you were on ‘Good Morning America’!” Andrew initially thought it was a joke, but when they showed him a video of someone dancing and shoveling snow, he realized it was him. Excitedly, he exclaimed, “Hey, that’s my hoodie! That’s my driveway! That’s me! Hi!” Andrew couldn’t contain his surprise and delight at seeing himself featured on ‘Good Morning America.’
ABC NEWS LIVE: The recognition that you always felt forgotten and now receiving national attention is incredibly important.
Sheletta, what message would you like to share? Do you agree with Andrew’s statement that you may have overlooked him because he was capable of handling everything independently?
Sheletta expressed her initial belief that her son Andrew didn’t need her as much as her other children. She has three kids who are non-verbal, can’t make eye contact, and struggle with following simple commands. She sees them as vulnerable children and worries about them becoming vulnerable adults. In contrast, Andrew can do things independently like riding his own bike, warming up ramen, and toasting his Eggo waffles. She thought he didn’t really need her in the same way. She was the one still pureeing food for her other children who are five, six, and seven years old and still in diapers. Andrew can handle tasks like wiping himself and washing his own hands. However, Sheletta realized that Andrew did need her, albeit in a different way. This realization helped her and her husband reconnect with their son and spend more quality time with him. They began to see him as an individual rather than just the older brother or the one they relied on for help with his siblings. They started inviting him to do things separately, like going to his favorite restaurant, having ice cream, or watching a movie. Sheletta acknowledges the challenges of parenting children with special needs, where it’s easy to feel overwhelmed and lose direction. She is grateful for the grace that Andrew showed them and emphasizes the importance of giving oneself grace as well. She concludes by addressing all parents and encouraging them to be kind to themselves in this love letter to their children.
ABC NEWS LIVE: If you are a parent with special needs children who are capable of being independent and taking care of themselves, here are my top two tips for you:
1. Encourage their independence: It is crucial to foster a sense of self-reliance in your children. Provide them with opportunities to make decisions, solve problems, and take responsibility for their own actions. This will not only boost their confidence but also enhance their life skills, preparing them for a successful future.
2. Establish a support network: While your children may be capable of doing things on their own, it is still important to build a strong support network around them. Connect with other parents who have special needs children, join support groups, and seek guidance from professionals. This network will provide you with invaluable advice, resources, and a sense of community that can make the journey easier for both you and your children.
Remember, every child is unique, so it is essential to tailor your approach to their specific needs and abilities. With patience, understanding, and the right support, you can help your special needs children thrive and reach their full potential.
SHELETTA advises parents to regularly check in on their children and make efforts to spend quality time with them. She emphasizes the importance of building a supportive network or “village” to provide additional support. Reflecting on her own experience, SHELETTA acknowledges the years she and her partner missed out on due to her involvement in early intervention. She also reminds parents to be kind to themselves, as even parents of typically developing children make mistakes. With the added challenges of raising children with special needs, SHELETTA encourages parents to show themselves grace and find ways to reconnect with their kids.
ABC NEWS LIVE: It is evident that Andrew has bestowed upon you his grace, and it is lovely to see that you both had the opportunity to embark on this New York trip, just the two of you.
We are having a great time, just the two of us.
Thank you so much for joining us on the show. We are incredibly grateful for your presence.
SHELETTA: We appreciate the opportunity to be here.
ABC NEWS LIVE: Good news! “Andrew Does His Dance” is now available on Amazon.
