Valentina Lavrinenko, a 60-year-old resident of Kharkiv in eastern Ukraine, is struggling to hold back tears as she attempts to heat up a pot of Ukrainian borscht on a small gas stove in her daughter’s apartment. The relentless bombardment of Russian bombs is taking its toll on the city, causing frequent power outages.
It’s been more than a year and a half since the passing of Skyler Gregg, an American volunteer who served in the Ukrainian army. During that time, the city of Kupiansk, where Valentina and her husband Viktor resided, was under Russian occupation for seven months. However, in September 2022, the Ukrainian Army successfully drove the Russians out, bringing an end to their control.
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Valentina will never forget the moment when the young American, Skyler, arrived. He seemed like a knight on a white horse, with his charming Colgate smile and warm heart. In 2022, after the liberation, Skyler from Washington state came to Valentina and Viktor’s rescue, helping them reconnect with their long-lost daughter and son through Starlink. It was a heartwarming experience for Valentina, one that she will always cherish.
Valentina shared how kind Skyler was during their interaction. Despite the language barrier, they found a way to communicate. Valentina showed him pictures of her family, and he reciprocated by showing her his own. Throughout their encounter, Valentina treated Skyler with hospitality, offering him coffee, tea, soup, and even socks.
The 23-year-old American, who tragically lost his life in an artillery attack around two months later, expressed to Valentina his heartfelt desire to assist the Ukrainian people. Skyler revealed his battle scars on his hands, a result of being wounded a few months prior, which moved Valentina to tears.
Valentina recalls the moment when she urged Skyler to return home, but he politely disagreed, responding with a warm smile. “I expressed my concern and told him that I would keep him in my prayers,” Valentina shares, emphasizing the special connection they shared.
“She adds that he became almost like a son to her.”
Valentina Lavrinenko expresses her eternal gratitude to Skyler for his selfless act of coming all the way from America to help liberate her. It is truly difficult for her to comprehend that someone would go to such lengths to assist her.
Making Connections
When the Russian tanks crossed into Ukraine in 2022, Skyler defied his father’s wishes and left his home in the U.S. to join the Ukrainian Army’s International Legion, despite having no prior military background. Despite Steve Gregg’s attempts to dissuade him, Skyler remained determined.
I first encountered Skyler at a hospital in the summer of 2022, where he was being treated for injuries sustained from a Russian drone attack at the frontline. He had bandages wrapped around his right arm and leg.
After going through such a challenging experience, Skyler’s determination to get back to the frontline remained unwavering.
Irina and Valentina stand outside their apartment in Kharkiv, contemplating the prospect of going to the U.S. They express hesitations about leaving their homeland, acknowledging the inherent challenges that come with such a decision.
A Special Bond
After the liberation in 2022, Skyler and his unit settled into a house near Valentina and Viktor. Valentina would lend a hand in the kitchen and assist Skyler whenever possible.
Valentina is in disbelief upon hearing the news of his death. She describes him as a kind-hearted individual who always strived for the best for their family. Valentina acknowledges that he went above and beyond, surpassing the efforts of many Ukrainians. She admires his fearlessness and expresses her emotions through tears streaming down her face.
On his wall, Steve proudly displayed a Ukrainian flag alongside a cherished photo of Skyler with Valentina.
Valentina proudly displays to The Daily Beast a water bottle and towel gifted by Skyler. She cherishes these small presents, given to her during their final meeting in Kupiansk. Overwhelmed with emotion, Valentina couldn’t help but cry, sensing deep down that it would be their last encounter. Despite her pleas, Valentina’s attempts to persuade the young American to return home to Steve and his mother were unsuccessful.
“I reminded him to prioritize his well-being and not to forget about me,” Valentina shares, noting that Skyler continued to wear a smile as he reassured her, “I’ll be here for you whenever you need me.”
Steve, aged 58, expressed his gratitude towards Valentina for being there for his son Skyler when he couldn’t be. He acknowledged that Valentina was the one who had the opportunity to bid farewell to Skyler. Steve mentioned that he has not only lost his son but also gained a new family and a renewed sense of purpose in his life through this experience.
Steve, a divorced man with a daughter, has taken the initiative to sponsor Valentinas’s family to relocate to the United States under the Uniting for Ukraine program. This program offers an opportunity for Ukrainians who are fleeing the war to seek refuge in the U.S., provided they have a sponsor.
“It gives me a sense of purpose knowing that I can make a difference for them,” Steve expresses passionately. “The war is an absolute nightmare. It’s pure evil. It’s like living in hell. It’s terrible in every imaginable way. I feel compelled to take action and do something about it.”
Steve, a former engineer, shares that Skyler has always had a deep desire to assist others and explore the world, often overlooking the potential repercussions. After being diagnosed with cancer a few years ago, Steve had to leave his job. However, he is now in remission and actively searching for employment to ensure he can provide for Valentina’s family if they relocate to the United States.
“I’m currently making an effort to communicate in Skyler’s language and approach situations the way he would,” Steve expresses. “Although not everyone comprehends me, it’s a goal I’m genuinely committed to achieving.”
According to Steve, he feels that he is quite distinct from Skyler. However, the loss of his son has taught him to adopt some of his son’s qualities.
New Futures
In Kharkiv, Valentina’s daughter, Irina, shares that Skyler made a lasting impression on her mother. Despite the proximity of the Russian forces, Valentina’s father remains in Kupiansk, taking care of their home. Steve is determined to provide them with a chance to seek refuge from the Russian missiles in the safety of the United States.
“My father has always had a deep desire to go to America, a dream he harbored long before the war. However, my mom and I are filled with apprehension,” expresses Irina, expressing concern over the language barrier and bidding farewell to Ukraine.
Valentina believes that her connection with Steve has deepened due to the tragic loss of Skyler.
She has a strong desire for them to meet someday, even if they are unable to make it to the U.S. She envisions inviting him to Ukraine after the war, where she can show him their homeland and share anecdotes about her encounters with Skyler.
According to Steve, having contact with the Lavrinenko family holds significant meaning.
Steve, who expresses a sense of purpose in his life, is determined to navigate through the process of figuring everything out. In the event that individuals seeking assistance do approach him, he is committed to going the extra mile by aiding them in learning English and securing employment opportunities. Additionally, Steve harbors a desire to visit Ukraine at some point in the future.
“This Ukrainian family has been a true blessing for me. They have saved me from sinking into a deep state of depression. I had lost my sense of purpose and reason to keep going, but they have helped me find it again,” he expresses gratefully. “I will forever be thankful for their presence in my life.”
